Is Steve Jobs a Closet Ninja?

This is probably just unfounded gossip, but Bloomberg is reporting on a story about Steve Jobs getting stopped at the Kansai International Airport last July, after security found ninja stars in his carry-on luggage. And boy he got pissed-off.

This is where I tell you that he took out his Hattori Hanzō sword and killed everyone in the airport lobby, running away with the shurikens in his Quinjet. But according to Bloomberg's translation of Japanese SPA! magazine, this is what happened:

Jobs said it wouldn't make sense for a person to try to hijack his own plane, according to the report. He then told officials he would never visit Japan again, the magazine reported.

Bloomberg claims that a Kansai Airport's spokesman confirmed the episode... but he wouldn't reveal the name of the passenger involved in the incident. The spokesman said the private jet passenger trashed the shuriken at the security point, but declined to disclose his name because of the airport's privacy policy. Bloomberg also says that the airport doesn't have a separate boarding for private jet passengers, which explains why this unidentified man had to pass through the usual security point.

Apple declined to comment, which could mean two things: This rumor is so ridiculous that it doesn't need commentary or this rumor is so ridiculous that it doesn't need commentary. Or a third: It may be true. I want to believe it is. If any of you have any photos of Steve trashing his ninja stars at the security point, send them to me.

In any case, if any of us appear dead with a sai up our most tender parts, another rumor would be confirmed: Steve has been watching too many Teenage Mutant Turtles episodes on his Apple TV.